How Far Can Golf Go?

Wearing his Ryder Cup hat, the Psychic aims his old Bull’s Eye Putter at the rubber-putting cup on his living room carpet. With each stroke the Psychic is thinking, not about the stroke, but about the Masters.The Psychic is a golf fan and the Masters is by far his favorite tournament. As the slushy snowflakes fall outside, the Psychic focuses on the Masters. “Why do I like the Masters so much,” he wonders? The reasons run through his mind in rapid order: He loves the beautiful course where he knows every hole. He knows the hole locations each day. He respects the civility of the fans! What?? Yes, he loves the civility of the fans. They understand the rules that the Masters Tournament Committee has not altered since the tournaments inception.

Suddenly, the Psychic feels the call from the crystal ball resting on the round table inside his study. He replaces his beloved Bull’s Eye in his bag and moves into the dimly lit room that houses his tell all relic from the past.

His well-worn turban replaces the Ryder Cup cap. It was not cold in his study, but the Psychic rubbed his hands together to develop some additional warmth and his hands move slowly over the clear crystal.

The Masters Tournament comes into view. The scoreboards are blank; it must be a practice round. As he views the patrons he realizes that there are no cell phones. There are no armrests on the patron’s chairs. There are no golf caps being worn backwards. There are no patrons running. There are no drunks. There are no obnoxious fans heckling the players from behind the ropes.

Then from the corner of his eye the Psychic notices a twitch from his sweat stained Ryder Cup cap. Instantly the view within the magic globe becomes a split screen. Half of the screen remains at the Masters, with its calm quiet respectful patrons. The other half becomes a sea of red, white and blue. The noise is deafening. The fans are a rowdy group of people who are cheering for Team Europe to miss a putt. Hit it into the water. Personal insults are shouted at team members on both teams. Then the Psychic sees a recent front page of the Star Tribune showing Ryder Cup hero, Phil Mickelson guzzling a magnum of winner’s champagne as thousands of drunken fans go wild.

Suddenly the half of the scene that contained the Masters is gone. It is replaced with images of the “Bird’s Nest,” hole number 16 at the Waste Management Phoenix Open at TPC Scottsdale. The presence of law enforcement officers does not deter the crowd of rowdies who look more like a bleacher full of drunken Eagles football fans than respectful golf fans. While some of the drunks are handcuffed and hauled away, others shout jeers at those officers attempting to maintain control. The Phoenix Open has created an atmosphere that resembles the Ryder Cup.

Then the Psychic sees headlines in newspapers from all over the country. “Waste Management Phoenix Open set new records for single day and event attendance!”

Choosing to copy Ryder Cup’s crowds, the Phoenix Open has become the bar by which all other golf tournaments are measured. ALL EXCEPT THE MASTERS. The Phoenix Open has become the most attended golf tournament bringing with it the largest donations to charity and huge purses for players. The Waste Management’s 16^th green is almost as popular as the Masters’ 12^th green.

The scene inside the crystal changes again. The Psychic sees golf fans completely surrounding the 18^th green of a major golf event. Fans are waving their arms, whistling, shouting, flapping cut outs of players wives while a golfer is attempting a final slippery 4-footer that will determine the championship. The Psychic is seeing golf tournaments of the future. Fans are paying big bucks for tickets. Fans are paying big bucks for beer and cocktails with fruit and umbrellas. The presence of security has grown to resemble a third world country. But, only the drunkest are removed.

As the Psychic shakes his head in disgust, he realizes: The PGA and USGA and the PGA TOUR have sold out. They have put the almighty dollar ahead of the game that is now represented only at the Masters. The governing bodies of these organizations have determined that for the kind of money that the pros make, they should learn to shut out all distractions. “It is no different than a basketball player attempting to win the conference championship in a hostile arena,” they say.

Sadly the Psychic removes his turban and throws his Ryder Cup hat into the trashcan. Never again will golf be the game of the Bull’s Eye Putter.